How Fallout Taught Me to Survive the Apocalypse

One of GameZone’s more paranoid authors has editorialized about some of the excellent post-nuclear survival tips he’s picked up from playing the Fallout titles. If your silhouette doesn’t get etched into the remains of a building, you’ll probably have to be a little unscrupulous to survive:

Without authorities around, nor the constraints of ‘˜civilized’ society, nudity could be an attractive option, but not the most practical. Where will you store your guns, and for the fellas out there, how are you going to defend yourself against mutant squirrels at the latrine? You better get some leathers, and then rip one sleeve off. If anyone questions it, tell him it gives you agility +1 and draw your gun in the confusion.

New world orders and reconstructionist regimes are not to be trusted, nor are drug dealers, religious fanatics, or robots with soothing voices. Everyone has an angle to work and needs a sucker to expoit. If someone asks for a favor, just shoot him. Why risk your life when you can still get the loot and put a poverty-stricken wretch out of his misery?

If murder isn’t your thing, you’ll have to work for a living. Women and children are notoriously bad clients who think tears can fill wallets. You’ll need to risk your life to get the big bucks, and possibly visit all sorts of exotic locations, like sewers that haven’t been cleaned in decades, mutant infested caves, booby-trapped buildings. are you sure you don’t want to at least be a thief?